My thoughts do not mean anything

This post was written by DoctorJay on November 11, 2009
Posted Under: A Course In Miracles - workbook

Day ten of A Course in Miracles continues with the lack of meaning of my thoughts.

I start the day’s exercise (five recommended) by saying my thoughts do not mean anything and allowing thoughts to come up with eyes closed:

  • Thought: “I cannot think of anything.”
    Affirmation: “My thought about ‘I cannot think of anything’ does not mean anything”
  • Thought: “I wonder what to eat for breakfast”
    Affirmation: “My thought about ‘I wonder what to eat for breakfast’ does not mean anything”
  • “I wonder why my body at times moves inadvertently.”
    The above thought came to me after an involuntary movement of a finger.

Since by now you know the drill I’ll not keep writing the affirmation just the thoughts that came up. Of course at this time I find it hard not apply the thought for the day to itself and keep thinking that the fact that my thoughts do not mean anything are now my thoughts so they do not mean anything.

Again we are are past and arrive at the here and now with our baggage and prejudgments. I am an analytical highly intellectual person who loves to think about thinking. I imagine that in time “A Course in Miracles” will do something to my perception to make me less left brained in everything – but that or not that is OK too.

Coincidentally I’m  wondering if my suicidal thoughts the other night had anything to do with all this meaninglessness that the book implies at this phase. I assume we are going toward discovering true meaning. However, at this phase when we are giving up our current meanings it is difficult at times not to feel nihilistic if one despairs.

Next thoughts which do not mean anything:

  • My ear itches.
  • I can feel my pulse in my left ear.
  • Life is but a dream.

Later on in the gym I was tired and automatically said:

  • I’m killing myself – this was a stupid meaningless self talk that I normally would not even become conscious of (kind of subliminal thoughts that cross your consciousness but you forget immediately). However, because of today’s workbook exercise I did realize what I was thinking and immediately said:
    My thought that I’m killing myself does not mean anything.
    This was a great relief.

I suppose that’s the answer to nihilism – if nothing means anything, then negative things and upsets mean nothing too.

It’s like one of my teachers said about procrastination: “If you are excellent at procrastination then procrastinate procrastinating.”

So far the Course has made me be able to laugh at small upsets and become aware of self talk that just passes through.

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